hello interweb world. it's been a while.
I can't say that I'm really ready to get back to blogging, but I'm a lot more ready than I was a month ago. A month ago was Israel and Jordan, and craziness, and decisions, and madness spinning and spinning. A month ago I was across the world, both literally and figuratively. A month ago I was not ready to face real life again.
A lot has changed in a month. The seas have calmed a little bit, I am back at school.
That is something that I could not confidently say a month ago.
I am now a student athlete.
That is something that I thought I would never be able to say again. A month ago I wasn't even sure that I could say that.
But a lot has changed in a month.
I am enjoying being back at school. At times the differences - already - between this year and last hit me, and I pause and wonder at what is to come. In many ways this year is quieter for me. My classes are not overwhelming, I do not have to make new friends, my schedule is consistent. I like this. But I am not a creature of habit. I tell myself I like routine and everything to be in order, I think this is a lie. I like change. If there aren't changes in life I get bored. So sometimes I have to tell myself to be satisfied with this life were everything is simply good right now. To enjoy the easy times because there will be storms ahead. So then I sit back and try a new concept in college - relaxation time. Enjoyment.
I think maybe a secret to happiness is learning how to be satisfied in every situation.
I'm still learning that.
But here's to the start of something new, because, to me, it is obvious that a new chapter in my life has begun.
Because I am not the same person as I was a year ago.
Because I am not even the same person as I was a month ago.
Because now I am more than I was then, and because now I am just the tinniest bit closer to the human being G-d is willing me to become.
So here is to the closing of a chapter of my life. It may be a little while before I open the next one fully, but for now, I sit and I wait. I try to be content and satisfied, and for now, it's working.
I can't say that I'm really ready to get back to blogging, but I'm a lot more ready than I was a month ago. A month ago was Israel and Jordan, and craziness, and decisions, and madness spinning and spinning. A month ago I was across the world, both literally and figuratively. A month ago I was not ready to face real life again.
A lot has changed in a month. The seas have calmed a little bit, I am back at school.
That is something that I could not confidently say a month ago.
I am now a student athlete.
That is something that I thought I would never be able to say again. A month ago I wasn't even sure that I could say that.
But a lot has changed in a month.
I am enjoying being back at school. At times the differences - already - between this year and last hit me, and I pause and wonder at what is to come. In many ways this year is quieter for me. My classes are not overwhelming, I do not have to make new friends, my schedule is consistent. I like this. But I am not a creature of habit. I tell myself I like routine and everything to be in order, I think this is a lie. I like change. If there aren't changes in life I get bored. So sometimes I have to tell myself to be satisfied with this life were everything is simply good right now. To enjoy the easy times because there will be storms ahead. So then I sit back and try a new concept in college - relaxation time. Enjoyment.
I think maybe a secret to happiness is learning how to be satisfied in every situation.
I'm still learning that.
But here's to the start of something new, because, to me, it is obvious that a new chapter in my life has begun.
Because I am not the same person as I was a year ago.
Because I am not even the same person as I was a month ago.
Because now I am more than I was then, and because now I am just the tinniest bit closer to the human being G-d is willing me to become.
So here is to the closing of a chapter of my life. It may be a little while before I open the next one fully, but for now, I sit and I wait. I try to be content and satisfied, and for now, it's working.
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